Introduction

Ever since my previous Kindle publication, “Self-Improvement Before You Die”, I’ve learned a lot! I’ve been in touch with my readers, who told me they couldn’t wait for another. I didn’t know what I could write for them, but it was clear when it sold over 600 copies on Amazon Kindle! I was shocked, so here’s what I came up with.

I call it “26 Practical Steps to Own Your Life”, running around the theme of central ideas and notions that come up throughout my experiences in life, those that prevent you from becoming a whole person. Our bad habits, ill practices, and mistakes hinder us, and we are haunted by what we could’ve done, but what about what we can do? That’s basically the heart of this book: unlocking the aspects of our lives that, for some of us, are hidden and unacknowledged, such as acquiring perspective, unlocking your leadership, becoming a happier person, and building better relationships. I’ve given you twenty-six methods for you to start with, and, I admit, it isn’t as easy as I’ve written them here but the easiest part is the will to start, the will to succeed.

In this book, you’ll find not only twenty-six steps to achieve a wholesome life but also stories of people just like you who have done everything to improve. It’s not to say that they’re perfect, mind you, but that they’ve experienced similar hardships just like you, and maybe their stories may shed light on something that you could do about yours. In all you do, just remember one thing above all others, from Ulysses, a poem by Lord Alfred Tennyson:

Though much is taken, much abides; and though We are not now that strength which in old days Moved earth and heaven; that which we are, we are; One equal temper of heroic hearts, Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will. To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

‍

Step 1 – Unlock your leadership

It’s hard to live a life purely in another’s shadow; if that’s you, then there has to be an end. Let today be your end so that you can experience the wonder of being a leader. Day to day, you tell yourself, “What about him makes him a leader, I could do better,” but you never take the initiative. You often feel helpless because others are in your way, or you feel distracted from what you want to achieve.  It’s time to make yourself someone who leads. Don’t keep following others, and don’t let others constantly lead you into a path you obviously know is not right for you.

When you’re at work, like I am, I constantly find traits in my so-called “leaders”, or “superiors”, who obviously don’t understand the nature of leadership, or what it means to be a leader. Leaders in our society are chosen for their credentials, but what happens when someone just cannot lead others? The others will not follow blindly to what that leader says, they’ll ignore and mock, laugh behind his/her back and insult their superior—they will never truly have respect for their leader and respect is at the heart of leadership.

Many people are just fine with playing follow-the-leader, and some are okay with that. Often, these people recognize the faults of the other person’s leadership. For example, have you ever said to yourself, “Why would she/he do that? It’s obviously wrong”. These feelings are obviously happening more than they should; what does that mean to you? It means that it’s time to move on: become a leader.

According to Entrepreneur.com, a source that I find highly credible for this kind of information, a leader is someone who:

1. Conveys a mission
2. ‍Who has a vision
3. ‍Who has a goal
4. ‍Maintains competency
5. ‍Surrounded by a strong team
6. ‍Has powerful communication skills
7. ‍Has an impeccable ability to inspire
8. ‍Powerful ambition towards success
9. Always has a “can do, get it done” attitude.

Learning to become a leader is possible, but it’s not something that will happen instantaneously. With every challenge you experience, you have to approach it with the will to “get it done”. As you’ll read in Vanessa’s story below, she acquired her ability through inspiration, ambition, and dedication. There is little that Vanessa can’t achieve because of her dedication to herself, her ability to inspire others, and her positive “get it done” attitude, which is a combination noteworthy of leadership.

Being a leader doesn’t mean jumping to every opportunity that arises, it means knowing when it is most appropriate; for example, often in a group I find myself taking the initiative to be the leader, otherwise I know that the situation would go under chaos. People often ask me why I’d be the leader. I reply, “It’s because no one else wants to take responsibility”. They either deny or accept that as truth, but regardless, it’s important to continue unless others are interested in balancing the leadership role and making a strong team, which is a necessary component of great leadership.

I’ve easily worked with some of the most annoying people ever, people who were in a position of leadership that should never have been there. Choosing a leader isn’t very easy, especially in a business environment. The compromise is always choosing the type of leader that they think will be best for the employees, but it’s never someone that employees really elect for themselves. This kind of leadership I would consider unnatural and will be met with extreme resistance. It’s advisable to avoid forming these relationships, but it’s beyond your control in a business environment.

In any scenario similar to this, I reckon that the people will seek another to adopt the leadership role—even though they already have one. The difference between the leader they have and the leader they chose is simple: the one they chose is naturally more legitimate, and the people agree and would show their loyalty more profoundly. Excuse the Darwinist reference; however, the environment naturally selects this legitimate leader to pursue his/her evolutionary benefit to the entire group—this is the ideal leadership position.

There are thousands of concepts, ideas, and theories about what a leader should do, should be, and should behave. Nevertheless, I’d like to state clearly that a leader mustn’t be laissez-faire (i.e. lazy). Although this leadership style is perhaps best in a situation where group members are highly skilled and trained, it almost always results in degradation and the destruction of group cohesion. Giving members their own choices and freedom makes them more likely to feel entitled and begin to push forth their own personal motives. Often, laissez-faire leaders pass on the responsibility of leadership to others, thereby dispersing their effect. The result is that people become confused and ask who I should talk to about this.

The last thing a leader wants is someone to come up to him/her and ask: whom should I talk to about this? At this moment, the leader has caused terrible and irreparable damage to his reputation and to group cohesion, so it is advisable to avoid laissez-faire leadership behaviour.

Being a leader will consume much of your time, thoughts, and efforts, but the intent is always to rely on the effectiveness of proven leadership methods. The reason why I didn’t provide these proven methods is simple: despite the thousands of theories that exist out there, you’ll eventually choose a synthesis of them all, whichever theories you combine together using your experience of people and your interactions with them.

The most important thing you can do is be open-minded and accepting and have a good sense to show respect to your colleagues. People need someone they can respect; people are more likely to respect you if you do the same.

‍

STEP 2 – Become happier

Happiness is abstract and unknowable—it is only experienced by you, which means it is accessible to everyone. Happiness is a response to conditions, stimuli, or situations that trigger satisfaction, a gradual or swiftly developing moment that fulfils you. This definition is arbitrary and incomplete because happiness lies in what you desire that you may or may not be able to have. In both respects, each moment of having and not having can be considered, in one way or another, a form of happiness (being with something you depend on may not necessarily make you happy).

Happiness is also relative; we learn this throughout our lives. It occurs in response to moments that have significance to us, which are both stressful and enduring in our minds, often returning tremendous benefits (e.g., peace of mind). Due to its relativity, happiness is a state of mind: this means that one can easily decide to be happy or alter one’s mental state for whatever purposes one needs.

One thing I learned growing up is that happiness takes time; this means (for me) that if you are not happy now, I guarantee you will be happy soon. Feelings and experiences tend to fluctuate; with positive experiences, you will improve your well-being. Happiness is inevitable. When I was young, I did not have nearly as many happy experiences as I did when I got older because it is around this time that we experience the most significant hurdles and stress. We are swamped trying to work out our lives, attending university, caring for family, and other responsibilities that seem not happy-inducing. However, when we reach an older age, we realize our lives are more about happiness. According to the British Household Panel Survey (1991-2003) conducted on 1,076 households, life satisfaction increases dramatically from 41-50 until retirement (70). Before this time, females suffered many hardships that affected overall life satisfaction.

There are many colourful and persuasive graphs and charts out there. However, one can summarize it: Happiness takes time, and it is essential to realize that your feelings are constantly fluctuating and that happiness is an eventual result no matter what. Others try to push their happiness by doing only things that make them happy, like watching a comedy movie, hanging out with friends, gathering with their family, and having a pleasant dinner with their significant others. Not all happiness comes from doing positive things; undoubtedly, a large portion comes from continually doing what you love, but you often have to do something you dislike. Based on the graph above, people are at their lowest satisfaction or happiness between 20-50 years of age. I have compiled a list of things you can do today to improve your happiness and enjoy your life.

Keep in touch with your close friends and family. Maintaining solid relationships throughout will significantly improve your stress levels, reduce anxiety, and make you feel more content and satisfied.

Smile and laugh a lot. Find the positive and make it worth it; laugh to express your delight—never hold it in!

Get things off your chest. If you talk about what bothers you immediately, you have less time to build up. We do crazy things when we are not allowed to express ourselves.

Avoid procrastination. You have more time for yourself if you live in order and follow your obligations and duties.

Do not gamble. Gambling always results in a loss. When you win, you lose control. When you lose, you become desperate to try again. Gambling is never profitable, so avoid it at all costs!

Return to nature. Nature has a calming and meditative effect. If you spend time hiking once a week and take in the fresh mountain breeze, the feeling is unique and different, as though it were purifying. If you camp and rely on your ability to live, it will also teach you that even in silence, even in meditation, there is significant room for personal growth.

Go to a movie. Seeing a movie is also relaxing, rewarding, and fun if you watch it with someone else. With someone watching with you, preferably a close friend, you can enjoy the fun and have someone to discuss those movies.

Do something new. Working on something new, developing yourself, and improving an old hobby is rewarding and satisfying. I have been doing this for years, and it has been enormously beneficial—something to do after all the work you have already done.

Expand your mind. Read the newspaper or an exciting book that teaches you something new or informs you of something you did not know. The more you learn, the more your knowledge expands, improving your happiness.

Spend less than you earn. When you spend less, you earn more. It is as simple as that. The less you have, the more stressed you will become and the unhappier you will be. A simple principle: work with a budget!

‍

STEP 3 – Activate intuition

Intuition has been the subject of heated contention and debate since psychologist Carl Jung. In 1921, Carl Jung described intuition as an “irrational function”. What is intuition? Why are some people more in tune with their own intuitive capabilities and others not? Jung believed that intuition is the result of “unconscious” perception, sounds almost supernatural doesn’t it? Intuition is inexplicable, meaning no one knows exactly where it comes from, but it’s possible to activate it within you.

Philosopher Immanuel Kant believed that intuition is something that occurs out of basic sensory information, separated by both external and internal intuition. External intuition is taken through the space at which intuition is triggered; internal intuition occurs within the space of the subject. What does this mean? Intuition can be triggered by many stimuli and could even manifest itself in dreams through what Jung called the “collective unconscious.”

Intuition comes without reference to any reason, it just happens. The bad vibe you feel when you eat something or recognize someone is absolutely normal, and you can’t explain it—it happens beyond your ability to reason it. What is it for? According to Dr Cappon, a physician in psychological medicine, “Intuition is the oldest, most vital part of human intelligence.  It is in daily use and accounts for human survival as well as for the secret of most successes.” Throughout evolution, intuition was the ultimate most valuable resource since Neanderthals and cavemen had no time to think (could they even think?), they relied immensely on their intuition to ensure their survival. It triggers the same way with you, as a mechanism to help you avoid displeasing scenarios.

Once my friend introduced me to his colleague, I told him ten minutes later that his colleague was just trouble, something about him wasn’t right. My friend asked me why I would think that, and of course, I replied, “I don’t know” (of course, since intuition is an irrational logic!). Naturally, my friend dismissed what I said, and three months later, the cops arrested his colleague for drug dealing. My friend asked me how I could possibly know that; I said I didn’t know anything and that he just gave me a really bad feeling. Some people just don’t have intuition or are unable to know whether they are experiencing it or not. Although I am unsure myself, I’ve done the following, which have significantly improved my ability to access my intuition.

Get Hypnotized: Getting hypnotized doesn’t mean watching a pendulum swing left to right, what I’m talking about is visiting a hypnotist who knows how the process works and how to get you out of that state. Although the mind state is forced, it gets you closer to your inner self, where your intuition is activated. It would be best to consult a hypnotist for a checkup and see how suggestible you are in that state. During this time, I worked on learning about the good and the bad to learn how to get into the centre of my being. I feel much better, though, after doing it, and the hypnotist discusses with you what happened, what you said, and what the ramifications of what you now know.

Think Positive, Always: Positive thinking is the ultimate state to be in, constantly worrying about things never serves any benefit. Being in a fear-free state can allow you to realize and improve, assess, evaluate, and execute. Three important functions that only a positive mind can manifest. With your positive attitude and your thinking, you will attract people you’ve always wanted, serving the principle of the law of attraction. People can sense a positive attitude because it radiates a richness that manifests into a confident, peaceful, and brilliant demeanour.

Just Let it Go: Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, it means resolving something once and for all. It’s about learning when the battle is won and when it’s lost, and when you let something go, you win! The less you have that clings to you and you to it, the more free and independent you become. Yes, that also includes Facebook, cigarettes, addictions, and other dependencies. You’re more than capable of overcoming any dependency; we all are, and I know I have, and I know it’s possible for you, too!

Try to Meditate: Meditation is one of the best ways you can interact and get into yourself in a way you can’t imagine. All it takes is silent breathing, good breathing exercises and relaxed muscles to push your mental state to an almost dream-like state. Although you can do yoga, which is a great form of exercise, tai chi is also available. I did Tai Chi for about two years, and from it, I’ve learned to meditate and get closer to a state ample enough for intuition. In my intuition, I am better at innovating and problem-solving, and I greatly owe meditation.

Be as Happy as You Can: We all want to be happy, but sometimes, it’s hard. Being sad is a choice, just like being happy. Naturally, the better choice prevails! Happiness brings forth greater intuitive connection, a stronger bond with you and with others, and an ability to sense even the finest detail about people, amplifying your intuition.

Trust Your First Impressions: First impressions are the most powerful and provide the most valuable insight into anything and anyone. Others would argue that the first impression contaminates the overall path towards enlightened understanding, but that’s not even true. Despite what they say, they generate first impressions regardless because of their instinctual purpose—to make sure we survive. In this way, first impressions are critical. If your gut feeling tells you something about your first impression of someone, you better pay attention!

Intuition serves a very powerful purpose: survival, survival, and survival. You need intuition to learn about your surroundings, people, and situations because intuition helps to isolate and calculate the cost-ratio benefit, as they say in business. How much are you willing to invest in a situation? Are you going to trust your gut feeling? Listen to yourself, see where your understanding lies, and amplify your ability to sense others in every way. Intuition is extremely valuable for your personal life.

‍

STEP 4 – Become a great talker

The conversation is interesting, functioning as an exchange of ideas and minds, including its capacity to further our reach and create more connections. Back in the day, people used to visit the Blarney Stone (in Ireland), where they kissed to have some conversational magic. Did it work? Diplomats, politicians, priests and statesmen travelled only to kiss the stone in hopes of achieving eloquence, so what happened?

No one really knows, and there’s still major debate about it. You can either go to Ireland and check out the Blarney Stone, give it a seriously big wet kiss, or try some tried-and-tested techniques to improve your communication and conversation ability. Give these strategies a try!

Always Listen: Listening is the key to having a meaningful conversation. Listening offers greater insight and clarity and reduces confusion. Often, you can simply have a conversation just by listening and furthering the discussion through qualifying and follow-up questions. This shows that you are attentive, responsive and enjoying the conversation. It might happen that you’re in a conversation that you’re not really enjoying. It’s happened to me often, but it is good practice to further the discussion and show your conversation partner that you’re worthy of their time. One thing you can’t help is when people talk too fast, what can you do? I always interrupt them and ask politely, or with a joke (as will be explained below), to slow down. It helps! Give it a try.

Eye Contact: Listening is only a tenth of the story; eye contact is perhaps one of the most important things you can do in a conversation.  Keeping eye contact is a physical bodily language signal, showing full attentiveness and ability to interact. People whose eyes stray show remarkable rudeness, impatience and disinterest. Have you ever looked into someone’s eyes as they spoke to you? Some people notice the difference immediately, especially those you are attracted to. Some might think it strange, but that’s only because no one has ever looked at them the way you are now. I once asked this voluptuous woman (whose breasts were pretty large) if she’s had problems communicating with men, and she told me, “Men just never look at my face.” Remember those comedy movies where the guy just stares at the woman’s breasts? Similar principle: keep your eyes on their eyes, not anywhere below!

Joke a Little! In any discussion, it’s important to always make a small witty (but not sarcastic) remark spark worthy of laughter. One of the best ways to start a conversation is with humour, Humour can also lighten the subject matter, from a professional discussion/debate to a more casual conversation about a subject matter, because humour sets a specific desirable tone that’s progressive and calming. There is, and there is not, a time for humour; for example, if someone starts a conversation seriously, they should not laugh or joke around. There’s also a moment where humour can be insulting, laughing about something that they obviously care about isn’t a positive conversational tactic. Humour is also a good way to break awkward silence because sometimes an awkward moment can really turn out to be embarrassing! Humour is also a good way to end a conversation and leave the conversation on a positive note!

Be Like Them: It’s advisable to be yourself, but you have to learn about how your group cooperates, behaves, and prefers. In the beginning, it might help you learn how they operate to mingle effectively. Don’t be like them to the extent that you’ll jump off a bridge, but like them to understand how to significantly improve your odds of being invited to be related to another.

Be Humble: No one likes someone who brags all the time or talks about things in relation to them. There is no benefit in talking about yourself if you think about it. This is because talking about yourself results in very little benefit, you’ll just make the other party irritated and want to kill you (not literally). Being humble means allowing others time to talk about themselves and affording you the ability to listen. You can do more with listening than with talking because people say even more things when they don’t say anything at all. Being humble also earns you respect because people respect someone who doesn’t brag, concede, and is pompous.

Talk about what you know: It’s plainly obvious when you talk about something you don’t know, some can notice and some others (you just got lucky). What’s good is also admitting when you don’t know, an exercise of humility (see #6). Sometimes, people can detect when you don’t know anything simply by reasoning. There are others who can talk about pretty much everything, from the general to the trivial and sometimes, even though they don’t know what they’re talking about, they always manage! At the beginning, avoid talking about random stuff and admit you don’t know, it’s always better than giving false information or projecting to others that you are ignorant.

Smile sometimes: Smiling helps a lot to situate yourself properly in a conversation. As with humour, smiling can leave a positive effect and minimize the seriousness of the conversation. It also expresses your genuine interest in the topic. When you smile, you give affirmation that you understand what whomever you are talking about.

These seven conversational tips are only the beginning, but consider them the basics of any successful and meaningful interaction. A meaningful conversation can help you create, extend, and advance your conversational and personal skills. A great conversation can leave a powerful impression, from landing you a job to a date—there is no limit to a smile, talking about what you know, eye contact, humor, and humbleness. If you’re afraid, push yourself and see where that goes; you’ll be thrilled.

‍

STEP 5 – Live for today

The future is alien to us, unknown, and incomprehensible. Most people are able to see their own future. How? They plan their future in so much detail. Why? They see a future only in the details. Some realize that the future comes from the pleasure of experiencing the unknown. I used to live in a future that I knew, but when the future arrives, it is seldom what we imagine it to be.

Some enjoy the pleasures of uncertainty but don’t experience the future without knowing how it could be. What does that mean? The future’s uncertainty is a manifestation of our own anxieties about what the future could mean. Through your own uncertainties, you generate a future full of doubt. One of my favourite theories of such a self-manifesting future is the law of attraction, explored greatly in “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne. In “The Secret”, Byrne showed a world that is constantly being created and re-created based on the decisions and our mood at the time: we get what we feel.

So, what does this have to do with an uncertain future? It has to do with your own uncertainty about who you are and where you are. One of my favourite texts is the Tao Te Ching, a Chinese philosophical text by Lao Tzu, one of the greatest Asian philosophers of all time. He stated that:

See the world as your self. Have faith in the way things are. Love the world as your self; then you can care for all things.— Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu.

Based on a dualistic worldview, Lao Tzu explains the interrelatedness of all things, the connection we all share with each other and how that affects us. What affects us now will affect our future. Are people who plan every instance of their future more secure in their future lives than people who don’t plan? It’s based on the person; some are more anxious, and others are not–it’s all in the “Tao” of the individual and how they understand how their future can manifest (if they understand, that is).

The present offers actually greater uncertainty than the future since everything you do has both a consequence and a purpose. Others live in fear of the consequence, the unknowable result of our actions, but others are willing to plunge into the unknown. The result is a present that is based on the future’s inevitable existence. This duality is both complex and simple, complex in that the future is unknowable but simple in the sense that we have the power to shape the future by what we do right now.

Seeing the world as you are will take many years to accomplish, but having faith in the way things are does not. Faith isn’t something that one expresses externally, i.e., having faith in God (but it can surely be powerfully motivational), but it is faith in oneself. Trusting in yourself can help you see a future you want, help you achieve a goal you need, and lead to an epiphany: “Love the world as yourself.”

‍

STEP 6 – Acquire perspective

Growing up, I realized that the greatest problem of our time isn’t AIDS, malnutrition, life, death or even God, but it’s with perspective. Perspective is the key to self-realization, success and happiness—I firmly believe it. The power of an alternative perspective is confounding to explain, but the result is evident—a euphoric feeling of understanding. Understanding is the greatest power we can ever hope to have, an ability within each of us to realize something profound about you, your family and the world.

Understanding isn’t just knowing; it’s the pleasure derived from the moment. Once I learned that perspective lies at the centre of our relations with others and ourselves, that perspective is the missing ingredient to solving convoluted problems, I experienced a kind of mental ascension as if I had opened an ancient door in my mind. This kind of feeling doesn’t occur all the time, but when it does, you simply never forget.

If you think about it, the debate about pessimism and optimism is simply an attempt to discuss its root concept: perspective. While both sides have equal to similar support and validity, perspective is what combines both to completeness. One needs to keep a steady balance of both pessimism and optimism to visualize their interconnectedness.

Perspectives cannot be borrowed; they can only be born from within. Although several perspectives exist, it cannot be taken from external sources. Most people share perspectives, but its originating source is almost always clear. For example, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. shared an enlightening perspective on freedom, explaining the world in a new way to those who have suffered under the reign of injustice. When people acknowledge and learn what it means to be free, they acquire a perspective—they know almost immediately that their perspective originated from somewhere else. But how did Luther acquire his? Simple, a desire to explain the world from within.

Perspective does not come from religion; it comes from yourself. Religion offers clarity, confusion, and contradiction, key elements needed to guide you towards a spiritual understanding. Although religion provides a basis for understanding, it does not offer a perspective. Religion is full of complex statements that are both general and uncertain. In the end, the text is up to interpretation. Some interpretations lead to great mastery of perspective, but others offer little hope inside. Where does one get perspective?

Perspective is acquired after experiencing different things, environments, and social situations. Although you strive to use the principles learned throughout your life, what religion and what your parents have taught you, you’ll realize that most of it is not applicable—those suggestions came at a time and place where they made sense to be used, but they don’t apply to those situations that you need. I’ve been to many countries: Lebanon, New York, Syria, Kenya, Somalia, Netherlands, Germany, Switzerland, and Canada, each of which has provided me tremendous insight, great experiences and knowledge that I never knew existed.

Whilst everyone generously offers a perspective, the perspective you’re looking for comes with time, patience, an open mind, and a thirst for knowledge. There’s a lot of knowledge out there, particularly spiritual and metaphysical, all of which have significant mental and internal benefits for you. Consider approaching the task uncertain and unknowing, the less you know the closer you are towards that goal of acquiring perspective. In the end, only you can acquire a separate and unique understanding of your own self.

‍

STEP 7 – Get a hobby

Hobbies are activities that many of us do on a regular basis. Typically, these activities are unique to our personal tastes and interests. For this reason, hobbies tend to enhance our sense of well–being, providing an additional sense of meaning to our already chaotic lives.

While physical exercise is therapeutic to the body, hobbies provide much-needed cognitive relaxation for the mind. By doing a hobby, we’ll accomplish valuable skills and further our experience and knowledge. For example, you might want to do soccer, archery, or train spotting. Hobbies have often led to important developments far beyond personal gratification. This is especially true of discoveries made by amateur astronomers or other developments in the field of computer science.

A hobby helps you to retain a healthy balance in times of stress. As an activity of choice, you can always derive pleasure from a hobby. Regardless of whether you indulge your hobby over a brief period, it will still provide much-needed stress relief. By exploring a hobby, you will find getting in touch with your inner-self easier. While the hobby’s nature is irrelevant, the time spent engaging your inner passion matters. For this reason, you will automatically manage your schedule to create time for yourself. This is a fundamental benefit of having a hobby.

While a high-powered career may be the single most important long-term objective for many of us, individuals who outwardly appear to have been successful in life may, in reality, be suffering from a multitude of ailments and strained relationships brought on by stress. For this reason, taking up a hobby can be particularly beneficial to our overall well-being, as it can restore balance to our lives.

It’s true that some hobbies are considerably expensive while others are relatively cheap. However, there are many ways to reduce costs – bringing a hobby within the grasp of anyone with a passion and a purpose. You should never think that just because you are strapped for cash or on a budget, you are unable to have a hobby. For example, you may wish to engage in reading, which is relatively inexpensive. Alternatively, you may consider writing, painting, photography, gardening, collecting, or saving money. These are but a few of the many activities available to you.

For the entrepreneurially minded, you may turn your hobby into a business, which will generate an additional revenue stream. All that is needed is the right mindset, fuelled by a desire for creativity. My personal recommendation for the artistically minded among you is to look to the field of Graphic Design. As there is a variety of free (and relatively cheap) software available for this purpose, the pastime will provide a creative outlet for those artistically minded individuals who may not be inclined toward sketching or painting.

The only limit imposed upon your choice of hobby stems from your imagination – or lack thereof. Therefore, it is recommended that you visit your local library to investigate the kind of hobbies and activities available to you. You will be surprised by how many of these activities are either free of charge or are relatively low cost. Of course, when seeking out any hobby, it is particularly important to ensure that it does not completely consume your time, resulting in the loss of your job or a strained relationship with your spouse or partner.

One approach to finding a hobby would be to think of something that had always interested you – something you had a desire to explore but never had the time. On the other hand, you may look to your post office and consider building a stamp collection. Collecting is one of the easiest, most inexpensive hobbies around. You can collect pretty much anything – from coins to matchboxes to postcards – the sky is the limit!

Hobbies provide us with something to share with those around us. For this reason, we should invest our time in finding a hobby. The experience is particularly rewarding, as it can enrich our lives.

Maybe you possess an artistic streak and would like to try your hand at painting. Alternatively, you may have a passion for writing, electronics or origami. Outdoor activities are particularly beneficial to your health and place you in a sociable environment. Maybe your friends and family members have already participated in a hobby you can join. So long as your hobby does not encroach upon the much-needed time spent with your family, you should – do it! Of course, be sure to research any long-term expenses beforehand in addition to the initial cost.

‍

STEP 8 – Find your natural self

The conversation is interesting, functioning as an exchange of ideas and minds, including its capacity to further our reach and create more connections. Back then, people visited the Blarney Stone (in Ireland), where they kissed to experience everyday magic. Did it work? Diplomats, politicians, priests and statesmen travelled to kiss the stone, hoping for eloquence, so what happened?

No one knows; there is still debate. You can either go to Ireland and check out the Blarney Stone, give it a substantial wet kiss, or try some tried-and-tested techniques to improve your communication and conversation ability. Give these strategies a try!

Always Listen: Listening is the key to meaningful conversations. Listening offers greater insight and clarity and reduces confusion. You can often have a conversation by listening and furthering the discussion through qualifying and follow-up questions, showing that you are attentive, responsive and enjoying the conversation. You might be in a conversation that you are not enjoying; it has happened to me often, but it is good practice to keep the conversation going to show your conversation partner that you are worthy of their time. One thing you cannot help with is when people talk too fast; what can you do? As explained below, I constantly interrupt them and ask politely or with a joke (as explained below) to slow down. It helps! Give it a try.

Eye Contact: Listening is only a tenth of the story; eye contact is perhaps one of the most significant things you can do in a conversation. Eye contact is a physical bodily language signal that shows full attentiveness and interaction. People whose eyes stray show remarkable rudeness, impatience and disinterest. Have you ever looked into someone’s eyes as they spoke to you? Some people notice the difference immediately, especially those you like. Some might think it strange, but no one has ever looked at them like you are now. I once asked this voluptuous woman (whose breasts were pretty large) if she had problems communicating with men, and she told me, “Men just never glance at my face.” Remember those comedy movies where the guy stares at the woman’s breasts? A similar principle: keep your eyes on their eyes, not anywhere else!

Joke a little! In any discussion, it is essential to include a small witty (but not sarcastic) remark that sparks laughter. The best way to start a conversation is through humour; it can lighten the subject matter, whether it be a professional conversation or a more casual discussion, because humour sets a specific atmosphere that’s proactive and relaxing. There is, and is not, a time for humour; for example, if someone starts a conversation seriously, it is not recommended to laugh or joke around. There is, at times, a moment when humour can be insulting; laughing about something they care about is not a positive, conversational tactic. Humour is also an excellent way to break awkward silence because sometimes awkward moments can be embarrassing! Humour is also an excellent way to end a conversation and leave it on a positive note!

It would help if you were yourself, but you must learn how your group behaves, cooperates, and prefers. In the beginning, it might help you learn how they work to mingle effectively. Do not be like them and jump off a bridge. Instead, be like them and understand how to significantly improve your odds of being invited to relate to another.

Be humble: No one likes someone who brags or talks about things related to them. If you think about it, there is no benefit in talking about yourself because it results in minimal benefit; you will just irritate the other party, and they will want to kill you (not literally). Being humble means allowing others time to talk about themselves and granting you the ability to listen. You can do more by listening than by speaking because people say even more things when they do not say anything. Being modest also earns you respect because people respect someone who does not brag, concede, and is pompous.

Talk about what you know: It is evident when you talk about something you do not comprehend; some can notice, and others (you just got lucky). What is worthwhile is admitting that you do not know, an exercise in humility (see #6). Sometimes people can detect when you do not possess anything by reasoning. Others can talk about everything, from the general to the trivial. Sometimes, even though they do not know what they are discussing, they always manage! In the beginning, avoid talking about random stuff and admit you do not know; it is always better than giving false information or projecting to others that you are ignorant.

Smile sometimes: Smiling helps situate you properly in a conversation. As with humour, smiling can leave a positive effect and minimize the seriousness of the conversation. It also expresses your genuine interest in the topic. When you smile, you affirm that you understand the subject matter.

These seven conversational tips are the beginning, but consider them the basics of any successful and meaningful interaction. A meaningful conversation can help you create, extend, and advance your conversational and personal skills. A meaningful conversation can leave a powerful impression, from landing a job to a date, and there is no limit to a smile, talking about what you know, eye contact, humour, and humility. If you are afraid, push yourself and see where that leads, you will be thrilled.

‍

STEP 9 – Develop a healthy eating lifestyle

‍A healthy diet is more relaxed than many people imagine. The key lies in adopting a diet that encompasses your likes and dislikes and your family’s preferences. It also includes adopting the correct balance of variety and moderation. Maintaining a balanced intake of vitamins, minerals, and other nutrients will make you feel more energetic and handle stress better. Due to our fast-paced daily lives, many give little thought to healthy eating benefits. However, we need to be serious about it. Organic foods are generally more expensive than their non-organic counterparts, so it has become increasingly more challenging for people to maintain a healthy diet.

Healthy eating does not mean restricting oneself to tasteless and unappealing foods. On the contrary, it is an opportunity to expand the overall dynamic of our palette – providing an opportunity to experience those foods we may never think of trying. As creatures of habit, we routinely frequent the supermarket – piling the same products into our shopping carts from one week to the next. Therefore, we seldom think critically about what we put into our bodies. While food cost plays a significant role in our selection, we must realize that the cheapest option may not always be the healthiest. However, there are other options; for example, you may plant your vegetable garden or bake your bread. As many of us spend more time at home, now is an ideal time to take the initiative.

Furthermore, learning to adopt a healthy diet also involves considering calorie expenditure. Therefore, consuming more than our bodies need is entirely unnecessary, and, accordingly, the less we need to eat to maintain a healthy balance. I have often experienced people so cautious about their caloric intake that they eat spoons of food daily, meaning hardly anything.

Fresh fruits and vegetables form the basis of every healthy diet because they contain vitamins, minerals, fibre and antioxidants. It is not easy to imagine doing this already, but consuming at least five portions of fruits and vegetables daily is imperative. The highest concentrations of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants can be found in colourful fruits and vegetables. These antioxidants help our bodies fight certain diseases and cancer. While nutritional supplements are recommended but do not provide the same benefits as a healthy diet, fruits and vegetables contain numerous vitamins, minerals and photochemical components which cannot be synthesized in the production of supplements.

In addition to maintaining a daily intake of fresh fruits and vegetables, we should limit sugar and animal fats. Sugary foods are calorie-compressed. Those high in saturated fat increase arteriosclerosis risk. Maintaining a healthy calcium intake is also imperative because it is an essential mineral to strengthen both teeth and bones. Whilst many calcium sources are high in fat, there are low-fat alternatives like skimmed milk. Of course, not all fat is toxic to us. We should strive to increase our consumption of fish and nuts because they contain healthy, unsaturated fats. Oily fish, such as salmon and mackerel, are particularly rich in Omega-3, which enhances mental agility and promotes concentration.

Regardless of whether your decision to eat right is based on your doctor’s advice or your simple desire to look and feel better – learning to consume healthily is a life-long habit. In order to eat right, it is necessary to choose foods that satisfy your appetite and give your body the nutrients it needs. At first, it may seem like an overwhelming task; however, if you are determined, your perseverance in choosing a balanced, healthy lifestyle will be rewarding over time. It is always recommended to eat three balanced meals a day. You will feel drained of energy and motivation by overeating or skipping meals. It is challenging to imagine, but I used to experience this too, which is my opinion. Just eat! Both can lead to obesity, as skipping meals puts your body into “famine mode”, resulting in additional body fat storage. It is also critical to learn when to stop. By continuing to feed your body when you are complete, you will add unnecessary calories to your daily intake. Ensure your meals are balanced among the six major food groups, and eat everything in moderation.

Sticking to a healthy diet provides your body with the necessary nutrients to sustain its normal function. Sleeping, healing, and thinking are more effective when your body functions correctly. It also guards against sickness, which in turn boosts your immune system. By maintaining a well-balanced diet, you can maintain a healthy body weight, boosting your overall productivity and ability to accomplish your goals.

‍

STEP 10 – Find your personal values

In order to decide what is most meaningful in life, we must first define our priorities. Our values represent the most significant aspects of our lives, the precious notions we hold dear. By assigning our priorities, we define our values – guiding the overall direction of our lives.

We are most satisfied with the alignment of our values with our ongoing success. For this reason, it is imperative to identify values that matter most and invest our time appropriately. By identifying our values, we can determine the appropriate decision-making steps and maintain this alignment. For example, if you value family but spend your time elsewhere, you will most likely feel internal conflict. On the other hand, if you work in a highly competitive environment but do not value competition, you will feel particularly dissatisfied. Therefore, it is necessary to define your priorities in life.

In defining our priorities, it is imperative to discover what we value most. Of course, this may be easier said than done since priorities tend to change throughout our lives. For example, we may value wealth and success today; however, these may be replaced by the need for a stable family balance in later life. In this case, our values change over time as our priorities shift elsewhere. Our defined values also influence our capacity to judge those around us. Those who value success will subjugate their peers. While contemporary society places more emphasis on success than compassion, we should always seek out values that align with our conscience.

Of course, it is particularly imperative to succeed in life; however, we should not confine our priorities to material wealth. This pursuit contains values inconsistent with our inner needs; success and achievement are insufficient to fill the void within our lives. Our values and personal influence are closely interlinked. While we all possess a degree of influence over others’ lives, the influence we exert comes directly from who we are. In turn, we can subconsciously affect others’ lives – whether we realize it or not. For some of us, honesty and forbearance are particularly relevant to our overall belief systems. Therefore, it is necessary to find these in our day-to-day lives. These values enable us to calibrate our moral compasses. Honesty and forbearance will be at the forefront of adhering to humanitarian values.

While we may feel that wealth and ego are beneficial to our long-term objectives, the consistent abuse of these extremities is damaging to our personal well-being. Therefore, we should take a step back to consider the effect of these values on our relationships with friends and family. We should also consider the world around us. If these values are particularly destructive, we may need to re-evaluate our priorities. For this reason, it is not surprising that the world around us mirrors our inner state, as everyone is inclined toward the orientation of those around them. Many people possess highly irrepressible life conditions, so we should avoid contact with negative individuals.

Since our friends affect our overall perspective on life, they also affect our ability to formulate opinions of our own. Therefore, if we find that their negativity constantly polarizes us, it may be time to look to some more positive influences. However, before looking to expand your circle of friends, take the time to see if the group’s overall negativity stems from a single individual. In this case, you may want to take action against that person. You may find that your behaviour influences those around you. In doing so, you will inspire others to resist negativity. However, should you feel the need to make new friends, you should be particularly discerning. You will fall in with the wrong crowd if you are unaware of their nature. Yet, by building friendships based on your hobbies and interests, you will invariably come across people who enjoy the same.

Since many decisions in life are determined by what we value the most, it is helpful to rely upon these values—using our values as a moral compass to guide our lives in the right direction. We are less likely to fall into the wrong crowd by assessing others’ values. We will know who we are and want to be by identifying and understanding our key values. These key factors serve as a guiding force in making the appropriate choices in any given situation.

‍

STEP 11 – Change your career

Unsurprisingly, a direct correlation exists between job satisfaction and personal well-being. While many of us hope to find satisfaction in our work, few achieve. However, there is always time to start over in your career. You will never have to work another day by choosing a career you enjoy.

Since we spend equal amounts of time at home and work, we must spend our time in a career we enjoy. In this step, you will receive valuable insight into finding the career you love or how to make the most out of your current situation.

The first step in considering another career is to find our driving force. Many of us will have fallen into the habit of looking for the most secure or highly-paid job. However, by considering our interests, we can unlock previously unseen opportunities. Having constructed this foundation, we may tweak our options for the right career.

When exploring new career opportunities, we must focus on our interests – regardless of how unlikely they may seem. Consider career options that ignite your passion or evoke your imagination. Most importantly, remember that patience is a virtue. Contemplation over time will allow you to pinpoint those activities you enjoy the most, leading to increased satisfaction. Having fallen into the habit of thinking that work is solely to receive adequate remuneration, we increasingly risk working a job we do not enjoy. In such a scenario, our job severely affects our physical and mental health. As a result, we will feel anxious, frustrated and depressed. We will be filled with an ongoing malaise affecting our relationships with friends and family.

Therefore, it is essential to consider the right reasons for a career change. The main reason is to find a meaningful and rewarding job, as we are far more likely to succeed in a career where our passion lies. Another is to pursue activities that fuel our excitement and spark curiosity, bringing us tremendous joy.

Once you have identified the reasons for changing careers, matching your interests to the wide-ranging choices is essential. While personality tests may not pinpoint our ideal career, they help identify our strengths and weaknesses in addition to those fields in which we excel. Therefore, it is possible to outline a career choice based on our personality type, allowing us to look at the careers with which we resonate the most. Many universities and colleges have adopted the use of career profiling technology in order to enable postgraduates to locate their ideal career. In doing so, students can consider specific career paths they may have never considered.

The different fields of expertise can be divided into various interests, including artistic, investigative, conventional, enterprising, social and realistic. Just like primary colours, these different career fields can be interlinked in various ways and tailored to your specific interests. In turn, you will know those careers that appeal to you. Once we have chosen our path, we must identify which skills we already possess and those we must acquire. Fortunately, most of us already possess transferrable skills that may be applied to any field.

When considering our transferrable skills, we must consider all activities – from hobbies to life experiences. In turn, listing these accomplishments will boost our self-confidence. Be sure to speak with friends and family; they may help you identify additional skills you overlooked. However, should other skills be necessary for our chosen career, there are many ways to obtain additional qualifications. Sometimes, a prospective employer may finance your tuition. You can obtain these from your local community college or public library. It is possible to acquire additional skills by volunteering or working on an internship, and it will afford you the added benefit of networking with individuals in your chosen field.

‍

STEP 12 – Change your habits

Before we can change our lives, we have to change our habits. Ghandi, renowned philosopher and activist, once said, “We must be the change we wish to see in the world”. By nature, we are creatures of habit, which comprise all we say and do. It is unproven, but I feel as though hobbies belong in the deep recesses of our minds, manifesting within the subconscious—we are often unaware of their occurrence. However, these good or bad habits contribute to our ongoing success.

We must shed those negative beliefs and all associated with them to affect a positive change.

We are all accustomed to making excuses. By our very nature, we recoil from face-to-face confrontations when difficult situations occur. We commonly say to ourselves, “It is just the way I am”, “I’m too old to change”, or “It is too hard for me,” which can all be attributed to an instinctive “fight or flight” reaction. Please read Felipe’s story of how this confrontation with life made him uniquely different. Nevertheless, to honestly look at improving our lives, we must say, “This behaviour is holding me back, but I have the power to change it.” For example, many of us have tried to drink less alcohol or lead a healthier lifestyle.

Nevertheless, we need help to do it. We ask ourselves, “Is it even possible to change?” Well, the answer is simple: yes! We always judge ourselves by our surroundings, shortcomings and limitations. The more we think about the stuff we cannot do, the less motivation it will give us – we will feel crushed and helpless. Instead, we have to learn to alter our life perspective. After all, we are the masters of our destinies – judgment is reserved for the man upstairs!

Are you a pessimist? Do you feel overwhelmed by daily challenges? It is enjoyable When we are challenged, but that overwhelming burden can leave us handicapped. The more we feel overwhelmed, the quicker we will become exhausted (terrible fatigue). Take it slowly; act like you are in control and see what happens! You will be more optimistic, controlled, and positive. Small changes lead to substantial, noticeable changes: think about it: nothing gets accomplished when we are stacked with duties and responsibilities. It is not easy to avoid negative emotions and thoughts; some situations leave you distraught and emotionally stung! No one is without his or her moment of real sadness, and when it comes to those moments, we can make the best of them. No one wants to see you miserable, and you will not want to see yourself miserable, either. Positivity can have a positive impact on you, especially on others.

However, since old habits die hard, changing after a while is possible. Instead, we must approach the task realistically: gradually change, one step at a time. For this reason, we must learn to recognize these different stages of change and where we stand within them. Many people contemplate change. Contemplation is particularly significant, as it ignites motivation. Once motivated, we are ready to prepare. Preparation is crucial, allowing us to define our road map to success. By allocating specific goals, we are already on track to changing our behaviour. In turn, this allows us to realize our true potential.

Finally, we are ready to act, including making the necessary adjustments to our daily routine and applying mediation to obstacles. However, it continues; having achieved our goals, we must retain our adopted habitual behaviour by sticking to a set routine.

Of course, it can be tough to shift our habitual behaviour when habits become ingrained into our psyche. Therefore, we have to change one habit at a time when making positive changes. We will only set ourselves up for failure by tackling too much too soon. Instead, we should start small and gradually work toward more extensive, problematic habits. Before tackling our habits, we should focus on the reason for effecting change—knowing why we want to change is a cornerstone to igniting our motivation. For example, when we decide to stop smoking, we need to know why we are doing so. In this case, it may be for the benefit of those around us or a loved one who suffers many ailments arising from second-hand smoke. Keeping various strategies on hand to curb relapse urges may be constructive. While these urges may last briefly, coping strategies such as discussion, meditation, and deep breathing will benefit our goals.

Therefore, finding a long-term strategy that works for you is imperative. While it is possible to alter your behaviour, it is a dedicated task requiring an ongoing commitment. Once you have decided to change, it is wise to start small. Too much too soon will only frustrate. It is impossible to change overnight; baby steps are the only way to success.

‍

STEP 13 – Manage your time

In order to manage our time more effectively, we must first learn to proportion our days accordingly. Therefore, it is particularly imperative to prioritise our most vital tasks to help us identify essential undertakings. In addition, it is crucial to set aside those that can wait. With that in mind, we can incorporate everything we wish to accomplish into our daily lives. It may be challenging to manage all of our commitments effectively. However, it will ultimately reduce our overall stress level, resulting in a much easier and more meaningful life. By identifying those responsibilities that are most meaningful to us, we can spend our time more effectively. The discipline of administration comprises three core components: prioritising our responsibilities, managing our commitments, and, most importantly, learning to curb our procrastination. By learning to administer time appropriately, we will oversee and prioritise all of our responsibilities. We can invest our time by weighing our responsibilities against our values. For example, we value time spent with our family. However, circumstances seemingly beyond our control may force us to focus our attention elsewhere. However, by deciding what is most relevant to us, we can find the time to incorporate these activities, which will reduce our overall stress.

A key obstacle to effectively organising our time is procrastination.

It is imperative to devise an appropriate strategy to curb this behaviour, as it will only result in missed deadlines and additional stress. However, by taking control of procrastination, we can accomplish more. When you are overwhelmed with commitments, knowing how to politely turn down inconsequential activities in favour of those you value is critical. One of the primary causes of stress is a hyperactive schedule. We must learn to prioritise our commitments while politely declining unimportant ones. The result is clear: We can organise daily activities and focus on the most critical responsibilities.

Firstly, we must learn to prioritise the most critical tasks. These will include those obligations that are critical. For example, we all must pay our credit card bills on time unless we want a penalty. With this knowledge, we can initially prioritise ways to acquire enough money to pay the bills and satisfy other commitments. Secondly, we should focus on meaningful tasks, including spending time with friends and family, a daily exercise routine and guided meditation. We may also include those responsibilities that will result in problems further down the line if left untended. Finally, we should discard those trivial tasks that contribute nothing to the overall quality of our lives. We will have considerably less to worry about having categorised these tasks appropriately. Instead, we can redirect our time and energy toward more meaningful tasks. We may realise, however, that some of these tasks are unnecessary. Of course, it is often the case that the more stressful or unpleasant a task is, the more likely we will procrastinate. However, we must realise that putting off the inevitable will only increase our stress level over the long term. Therefore, to effectively manage and control procrastination, it is recommended to maintain a daily diary to organise and structure your time, which will allow you to visualise the most significant activities, making it considerably easier to manage your time.

Another method of combating procrastination is dividing long-winded chores into smaller, bite-size components because many of us cannot focus for extended periods. However, we can manage our time by segmenting these tasks into smaller components. In fact, by assigning ourselves miniature deadlines, we will be far more organised in our efforts to achieve our goals and reduce our stress and overall burden. By learning to administer our time, we can prioritise our responsibilities while taming procrastination and managing our commitments far more effectively. Of course, procrastination is not the only issue—an excess of commitments will also lead to increased stress. Therefore, we must realise that we are not entirely giving up on an engagement by letting go of a particular commitment. Instead, we prioritise what is most significant while realising our limitations. After all, this is what makes us humans.

‍

STEP 14 – Learn to meditate

Many of us perceive meditation as a creature of the “New Age Movement”, but it’s not true: meditation has been practised for millennia. When we think of “meditation”, we often recall Buddhist monks in a Tibetan temple; nevertheless, meditation is the approach to our mental well-being that many cognitive psychologists call “mindfulness”. However, meditation is more closely associated with our ability to concentrate than our overall spirituality.

Meditation is our ability to focus on the present while excluding external influences. Learning to meditate will improve our overall cognitive function, changing our thinking and feelings. In fact, daily meditation guides our cognitive processes toward more positive thought patterns, resulting in an increasingly optimistic outlook on life. This mindset is beneficial in depression, where individuals withdraw from their surroundings. Over time, meditation will result in emotional equilibrium and negative thought regulation. In addition to emotional regulation, meditation improves multitasking. Many of us believe that our attention is infinite; this is not the case—our brain operates at a mere twelve watts of energy, so it is necessary to economize its overall functionality. As you may know, we don’t multi-task; our cognitive processes split our mind power between multiple subjects. As you can imagine, multi-tasking is complex.

So, how do we improve our multi-tasking ability? The only way to enhance this cognitive process is to train our concentration to switch from one task to the next more effectively. Therefore, we must learn to manage our engagement more effectively through meditation. Meditation benefits our concentration and health. This is because daily meditation will enhance neural connectivity between the axons and dendrites in the brain associated with working memory. It will also improve the function of the right insula, which is an intersection within the brain. This will result in enhanced connectivity, making it easier to micromanage various tasks. Until recently, we believed that our neural networks evolved with adulthood. However, with just a few hours of training, it has been shown that our neural structures will continue to grow, mirroring those of a younger mind.

To meditate, we must close our eyes. This will help you purge your mind of all external influences in your day-to-day existence. While the duration of the meditation is discretionary, it is necessary to remain comfortable. While meditating, conjure up the image of anything you wish to reflect upon. Most importantly, relax! A more complicated meditation method is “meditation through mindfulness”. One can accomplish this by focusing one’s awareness on the present and looking at events objectively. This meditation method is complicated, as we focus on the moment subjectively. We must maintain absolute impartiality to the subject matter to distance ourselves from all emotional attachments. You may also wish to attempt a method of meditation known as “imagery meditation,” which is particularly helpful for those who experience difficulty focusing on a particular subject. It may be practised within a group setting, whereby one person will set the scene for all participants to visualize; alternatively, it may be practised alone, whereby an individual will imagine a particularly relaxing location within their mind. Meditation requires a particular state of mind. When you open your eyes, concentrate on your experiences. If applicable, discuss your journey with others in the group. You can keep a diary or journal of your meditation experiences. In turn, this will allow you to reflect on your journey and bring the subject into focus.

Meditation improves our ability to concentrate.

Focusing on a single object can strengthen our cognitive ability. Ironically, we may feel that meditation slows us down; however, this could not be further from the truth in practice. Meditation increases processing speed and cognitive ability. It strengthens those areas of the brain most at risk of psychological decline. Meditation improves our multitasking ability and lays the foundations for our future well-being.

‍

STEP 15 – Broaden your horizon

Have you experienced an epiphany in your life? Many of us have arrived at a metaphorical crossroads where we face the decision to broaden our horizons or lose all direction in life. We will often need clarification about where to begin. However, I suggest several simple and effective steps toward achieving your potential. It is not uncommon for our self-esteem to suffer from self-improvement. We shouldn’t fear failure but use it to catalyse our self-discovery journey. We can view our failures more positively when we confront our fears. Our failures and mistakes help us identify where to improve and overcome personal uncertainty.

Firstly, we must identify the obstacles that stand in our way of success. Of course, many of us will need help knowing where to begin. However, by recognising our weakest areas, we may start by drafting a plan of action leading us towards success. Are you hesitant about incorporating an unfamiliar workout into your daily routine? Are you afraid it will be too strenuous or painful? In this case, your fear of failure – irrational or not – should be considered a guiding factor in defining those areas of additional attention.

Secondly, it is essential to surround ourselves with those who share our values and long-term objectives. In doing so, we will avoid negativity from those not sharing our efforts. As our values are individual and unique, focusing on those who oppose our well-being is counterproductive. More often than not, many of us will assign ourselves goals that need to be more specific and easier to accomplish. Instead, we should set easily attainable goals to avoid discouragement. We can weigh our progress against our long-term ability to attain those goals by ensuring ongoing transparency. Now, I am preparing to give you a homework assignment: I would like you to take a piece of paper and write down everything you wish to accomplish. For example, if you want to increase your perseverance level, I would like you to write this down. Now, try to think about how you want to persevere. Try to visualise the daily actions you need to do to fulfil those goals. You will likely succeed if you take an organised approach.

The next step is to monitor your overall progress. You can significantly reduce your learning curve by dividing your goals into smaller pieces. Therefore, you can accomplish these smaller tasks far more effectively and efficiently. Many of our daily activities broaden our horizons. You may not have realised, but reading is an excellent method because you’ll learn many things you missed.

Furthermore, it will allow us to appreciate others’ achievements, including those we perceive far beyond our imagination. While the initial value may appear incomprehensible, it will enable us to enjoy ideas we never knew existed. As a result, we will broaden our imagination and perspective on the world.

Another way to broaden our horizons is through creativity.

Have you ever wished to express yourself through painting, songwriting, or construction? Now is the ideal time to do so through the many available media sources. However, trying something completely different from your current approach is recommended. Maybe you can write a book geared toward a younger audience – sharing your childhood fears and insecurities. You may not realise it, but the book may profoundly affect your readers’ lives. Every day should present an opportunity to surpass yesterday’s accomplishments. In continually working toward your goals, try focusing on your inner qualities instead of superficial ones. After all, your inner light will define the years ahead. That’s why believing you will improve yourself from the inside out is necessary, not vice versa.

By now, you will have realised that the road to self-improvement is easier than you once thought. You can steer your life in any direction when you’ve taken charge. In the end, infinite possibilities lie in your mind. You can do anything you put your mind to.

‍

STEP 16 – Reflect positively

When we reflect on our lives, we must consider our shortcomings, virtues, thoughts and feelings. However, self-reflection also requires us to reflect on our thoughts and feelings and consider others’ perceptions of us—the key to improving our shortcomings. Consequently, we’ll be able to evaluate our decisions and lay the foundation for a better future. This greatly depends on the feelings and emotions a self-reflection period may evoke. Tranquillity is where we want to be, and we must shift towards it. Looking back on these past experiences, both positive and negative, we can recreate them in our minds. Making the experiences as clear in your mind and as visible as possible will help us understand and learn about them. We can gain tremendous perspective when we understand the reasons for our emotions and why. This will allow us to purge our minds of any repertoire of feelings. Consequently, we can improve our overall forward-thinking capacities and personal views by learning from adversity.

While in our state of self-reflection, it is vital to perceive emotions and consider the feelings of those who come to mind. For example, when confronted with an individual’s gracious smile, anxiety or stern appearance, we might be able to decipher hidden clues about what transpired. These are called “micro-expressions”, and knowing them might help us learn about what we see in our reflections. We must consider how others feel about us and their emotions at the time. We also have to learn to follow our intuitions, an invaluable ability that can help us see more than we usually see or understand. In the end, self-reflection allows us to improve our overall sensitivity to the world around us, and consequently, we will become increasingly tuned to our surroundings. When we self-reflect, we should examine our mirror image; that is what we see when we look at ourselves. I often look at who I am and what I see and consider are my superficial traits. For example, we should ask ourselves: is this a particular self-image we want to project? Our mirror image may benefit from improvement. If our appearance could be more inviting, it’s time for a change.

When self-reflecting, we must consider the overall polarity of our cognitive process. For example, you may be a positive thinker or a pessimist. While it has been determined that positive thinking possesses many psychological and physiological benefits, research has invariably shown that a far more pessimistic outlook on life will result in anxiety and depression, including other mental health issues. By gearing our cognitive process toward a far more positive outlook on life, we will experience an increased capacity for love and happiness. In turn, we will find that those around us reciprocate these emotions as we become more sensitive to their feelings. Positive thinking will also decrease stress and improve our ability to cope with difficult situations. It will also strengthen our immune system and improve our physical and mental health. However, it will raise our spirits and boost our confidence. The first step toward positivity is self-talk. This influences our cognitive process’s direction, allowing us to shift towards a more positive outlook. On the contrary, negative “self-talk” is an unhealthy habit when surrounded by others’ negativity or hostile individuals.

Before making these changes, we must look at ourselves and learn about what we have become and want to become. In this case, converse with yourself daily and transform negative thought patterns into constructive ones. For example, when you think “something is too complicated”, you might want to consider instead, “it presents an opportunity to tackle the problem from another angle”. A fundamental rule in this approach is to avoid slipping into a pattern of thought you would not outwardly express toward your closest friends or family.

While shifting from an adverse perspective toward a more optimistic approach will take time, with continual perseverance, it is possible to move away from negative self-evaluation toward a far more positive understanding. As I mentioned, we shape our reality at every turn, and negative self-evaluation hinders it. Why not think positively? It’s always a question I ask myself when faced with a stressful situation.

‍

STEP 17 – Get enough sleep

I don’t know about you, but I feel like sleep wastes time (like many others do). But we shouldn’t think like that because a good night’s sleep can significantly improve productivity. A good night’s sleep is closely related to our temperament and mental well-being. Most of us average approximately nine hours of sleep per night, but that figure has been reduced to just seven hours in recent years. Consequently, many of us experience a substantial lack of energy and lie around, affecting our productivity and social functionality. Of course, for those with busy schedules, getting a good night’s sleep is easier said than done. Did you know insomnia is caused by stress? A high level of stress prevents beneficial and restful sleep. Since deep sleep offsets many adverse side effects, sleep deprivation is ultimately connected with significant problems. These problems include depression, anxiety, memory loss, heart disease, weight gain, and increased cancer susceptibility. Try to plan your daily activities alongside your sleeping habits, allowing you to determine how much sleep is necessary—varying from person to person. However, this will average around eight hours per night for many of us.

By determining how much sleep is necessary, we can synchronize our sleep-wake cycles around our circadian rhythms. By maintaining a regular sleeping pattern, we will feel refreshed and energized. Therefore, we must experiment with various sleeping patterns to determine our archetypal sleep cycle. In any case, our bodies will always find their circadian rhythms by maintaining a regular bedtime schedule. Sleep also depends on the body’s ability to produce melatonin, which regulates our sleeping patterns. Our body’s melatonin production is controlled by our exposure to light; therefore, we stay out of dark places when sleepy. Daylight helps you stay awake, and bright light always helps me focus. Our lives are filled and packed with rush events, visiting places here and appointments there; the consequence is clear: melatonin production is frequently interrupted. For example, those of us who work in an office environment experience difficulty falling asleep due to extended artificial light exposure. This is also true of reading our emails late at night: our screens emit light sufficient to disrupt our bodies’ natural melatonin production.

Of course, we may boost our melatonin levels by taking the appropriate time to unwind in the evening. With a good night’s sleep, we can revitalize and re-energize from yesterday’s stress. When the day is over and the sleep cycle is left undisturbed, we can slip into a more relaxed state of mind. In addition to accommodating melatonin production, it is equally essential to ensure restful bedrooms. In doing so, our bodies automatically associate the environment with relaxation and sleep. Regular exercise is particularly beneficial to healthy sleep—the more we exercise, the more tired we’ll be and the faster we fall asleep. In fact, for every waking hour that our body is active, we can decrease the time to fall asleep by approximately three minutes. Therefore, it may be helpful to establish a regular exercise routine. We should avoid exercising too close to bedtime because it’ll raise our body’s temperature, inhibiting sleep onset. Stress management is particularly effective for those awake at night worrying about family or work-related issues. Try to manage your time appropriately because you’ll be better equipped to deal with stress. When we think about time more carefully and plan it, we can maintain healthy, natural sleep.

At night, switch off the lights. For this reason, we may evaluate our concerns to determine which are genuine instead of irrational. Remember, worrying ourselves to sleep at night is as effective as solving our problems by chewing bubble gum! When you experience a disrupted sleep cycle, your concentration, mood, and energy mess up. We are, therefore, more prone to accidents and physical illness. If you cannot enjoy a peaceful night of uninterrupted sleep, you may suffer from an undiagnosed sleep disorder. Therefore, you must consult with your physician to pinpoint the issue.

‍

STEP 18 – Reduce your stress

Stress can be attributed to the natural build-up of anxiety that occurs within all of us because of the excess of responsibilities that we take on. This stress triggers our body’s fight-or-flight mechanism, increasing our heart rate and producing an overabundance of adrenaline. Stress and anxiety can lead to physical symptoms such as headaches, irregular heartbeats, sweating, and nausea. It can also cause mental and emotional issues such as depression, difficulty concentrating, and a lack of motivation.

While stress may benefit us, overloads cause migraines, stomach cramps, back pain and insomnia. It may also affect our mood and social functionality. Furthermore, stress may weaken our immune system, leading to rapid disease onset. Therefore, to curb its adverse effect on our health, we must identify the source of our stress. Make sure to consult with a physician before undertaking any stress management course, but there are always some basic techniques you can try for yourself. Stress management techniques involve focusing on calming and reflective imagery while increasing self-awareness. One such method is “autogenic relaxation,” which involves applying our physical awareness to visual imagery to moderate our overall stress level. For example, you should repeat a particular word or phrase in your mind to relieve muscle tension. Try to imagine yourself on a tropical island; by imagining pleasant things, peaceful environments, etc., you will slow down your heart rate as you exhale. Dr Bhatt claims that autogenic relaxation, or the act of repeating a particular word or phrase in your mind to relieve muscle tension, can lower your heart rate.

Alternatively, you might want to try another stress management technique known as “progressive relaxation,” which focuses primarily on the physiological impact of stress on our nervous system. Begin by tensing and relaxing multiple muscle groups. This will enable us to focus on muscle tension and overall relaxation. Focus on the sensation of relaxation. Then, gradually move from the muscles in your feet and legs to your upper body. Finally, take a few deep breaths; you should feel calmer and more relaxed. By tensing and relaxing multiple muscle groups, you are helping to increase your body’s awareness of tension and relaxation, and this helps to create a sense of calm in the body. By starting with the muscles in your feet and legs and gradually moving up to the upper body, you are able to better focus on the sensation of relaxation and achieve a deeper level of relaxation. One progressive technique involves slowly tensing and relaxing your finger muscles while working your way up or down your body. Try pulling each muscle group for 5-10 seconds before resting for 25-20 seconds.

A combination of guided imagery and mental visualisation is a technique known as “self-hypnosis,” which allows us to directly communicate with our subconscious selves. In doing so, we will be able to enhance our abilities to take control of our thoughts and emotions – we will also be able to more effectively resist pain and develop healthier habits. Self-hypnosis is a powerful technique that can be used to increase our resilience and promote positive mental health, allowing us to become the best version of ourselves. Self-hypnosis is a more advanced stress management technique that should only be practised by a qualified physician. However, beginners may wish to practice deep breathing, an effective stress-relieving process. Deep breathing oxygenates the blood and stimulates the brain while quieting the mind. This exercise benefits frequent travellers, as it can be done anytime.

Yoga includes many relaxation techniques, including deep breathing, visualisation, and meditation. Yoga offers immense benefits because it offers significant returns for minimal investment. Music is particularly therapeutic for those suffering from overabundance. The waveforms will resonate harmoniously with our present state if the music is calming. This will reduce stress and high blood pressure while relaxing our bodies and minds. Listening to music can lower cortisol levels by reducing blood flow to the amygdala and increasing dopamine levels. This lowers the risk of anxiety, depression, insomnia, and other mental health issues. Furthermore, it can improve productivity and cognitive performance.

The final stress management technique involves visualising a mental journey toward a relaxing and calming situation. In doing so, we may embrace a variety of senses, including sight, sound, smell and touch. For example, if we envision a tropical beach, we may imagine the sand’s warmth, the ocean’s scent and the sound of seagulls. Stress management techniques are an effective way to decrease stress’ psychological and physiological effects. These techniques offer more than mere peace of mind; they will enable us to reduce the onset of numerous health problems directly attributed to stress. Furthermore, stress management techniques offer decreased blood pressure, a slower heart rate, increased blood flow throughout the circulatory system and improved concentration.

To get the most from stress management, using these techniques with regular exercise and a healthy diet is essential. These stress management techniques can help you regardless of your current stress level. Not only are these techniques easy to follow, but they are also readily available to you at any time. So, what are you waiting for? It would help if you explored these stress management techniques to discover which works best for you. Tackling excess stress is the key to improving your health and well-being.

‍

STEP 19 – Build better relationships

A passionate, loving relationship is one of the fundamental building blocks of any complete lifestyle. A healthy relationship can enhance many aspects of our lives while nourishing the mind, body and soul. However, a substandard relationship may harm our health. For this reason, we should avoid complacency. For instance, one should not overlook distress or dissatisfaction in a relationship, such as frequent arguments or a lack of mutual respect. While every relationship is unique, all kinships are built upon communication, compromise and perseverance. When you consider these principles, we can ensure that our relationships remain exciting, meaningful, and fulfilling for better or worse. Communicating openly and honestly ensures that both partners understand each other’s needs and expectations. Through compromise, we can learn to accept different points of view and make necessary changes to keep our relationships healthy. And through perseverance, we can show our commitment to the relationship, even when times get tough.

Communication is the key to always being involved with others. From what life has taught me, a lack of communication will cause a relationship to fall apart. While our relationship may appear superficially balanced, our internal distance will be apparent. Because of the growing emotional rift, you might no longer be able to relate to one another. This is like two boats tied together by a rope. If one boat moves away from the other, the cord will eventually become taut and rupture, resulting in the two vessels sailing apart. This is the same for us. Eventually, the distance will become too long to sustain our relationship, and we’ll have to part ways. We can remain connected, but the distance will be too vast to bridge. We must accept that our time together has ended. Of course, communication varies from person to person. While we may be particularly sensitive to sound, sight or touch, our partners’ cues may differ. When you’re with your partner, try to understand body language—nonverbal cues express more than you think. For example, we may enjoy an invigorating foot massage after a long office day; however, our partner may disagree and wish to cuddle.

Nonverbal communication is a much-overlooked method of interaction between partners. Body language is pivotal in daily communication; we must be particularly receptive to these nonverbal cues to understand our partners. Conversely, we should ensure that our body language is consistent with our feelings and emotions. For example, we may reiterate that we are “okay” with folded arms; however, our body language will signal the opposite. Therefore, it is essential to be mindful of how our partners may interpret our body language to effectively express our thoughts and feelings without words. The most common (and often overlooked) gesture between partners is touch. We should not underestimate the importance of a tender, loving touch that boosts oxytocin. This hormone induces our desire to bond with others. While many perceive intercourse as synonymous with physical intimacy, touch is equally essential. Of course, it is necessary to discover our partners’ sensitivities and limitations. For example, your partner may be particularly uncomfortable with a particular gesture. See where your relationship’s boundaries lie to prevent recoiling.

Many of us look back at when our relationship was new and exciting. However, with children, career changes and other commitments, finding time for each other may seem increasingly difficult. However, communication and involvement will deteriorate if we fail to spend quality time together. For this reason, it is necessary to maintain a sense of humour and an adventurous streak. Not only will this enable us to persevere during difficult times, but it will also reduce our collective stress levels. Career changes can significantly impact relationships, and it is imperative to know the possible effects. For example, one partner may be more successful than the other, or one may have to take on a larger share of domestic responsibilities. It is also imperative to ensure both partners have enough time for each other despite changes.

Another critical principle is compromise, which can be challenging to overcome. Although you want to eat your cake, see what happens if you give it up! In reality, all loving relationships are built on compromise. Of course, you must ensure an equal exchange—one person shouldn’t give up more than the other. The first step toward compromise is understanding what matters most to our partners. Naturally, it is equally essential for our partners to recognize our wants and needs since a one-sided relationship will result in anger and resentment. Compromise is the key to any healthy relationship: we can both benefit and understand by identifying each other’s wants and needs. When we take responsibility for our actions, we avoid blaming our shortcomings. Take responsibility for your actions and consider your partner’s needs so that you are both secure in your thoughts and actions.

Recognizing volatility in any relationship is critical since we’re drawn in entirely different directions. For example, our partner may be under additional stress due to a recent demotion while she experiences the loss of a loved one. In addition, our views may clash on critical financial planning or parenting issues. As a result, it may be increasingly difficult to agree with one another; however, misapprehension will result in anger and frustration. While some issues may be too complicated to resolve alone, you will soon realize that by adhering to the fundamental principles of communication, compromise and perseverance, you will be astounded by the improvement in your relationship.

‍

STEP 20 – Be honest with yourself

From as early as we can remember, we were told that honesty was the fundamental policy. Yet, many of us will continue to deviate from the truth in the false belief that honesty inhibits our ability to be ourselves. However, those with a malleable relationship with fact will likely lead an unstable and mysterious life. Many know what it’s like when someone doesn’t acknowledge the truth. We are mystified: was it always like this? If this is true, no one would be accountable for their actions; nothing would be accomplished.

If we’re unhappy with our situation, we won’t be happy if we’re dishonest. When we live in a cycle of constantly being illegal, we will perpetuate falsehoods and misunderstandings that will inevitably distort our understanding of the people around us. I admit that learning to embrace the truth is easier said than done. For some of us, it’ll be easier to trust the most straightforward fact than the whole truth simply because we haven’t formed an idea. The first step towards improvement is separating our individual experiences from our reality. We must be aware of pinpointing the problem, which results in our inability to improve our situation. As cognitive dissonance sets in, we will condition ourselves to perceive the world as we wish. Therefore, we must separate our perception of reality from the world around us.

Following our successful separation, we must familiarise ourselves with a new story consistent with our overall reality. We can rewrite our narrative as soon as we can unwind the story within our minds. Your account isn’t adaptable; you can change it anytime! Some don’t really believe they can make the change they need to in their lives and eventually normalise these behaviours as self-evident truths—they can’t do anything to change it.

No one ever said the truth was easy.

It cannot be very comfortable! Despite this, the fact requires both temperamental fortitude and character strength, which we all have. The truth can give us relief; we’re satisfied. What does that mean? We were made to tell the truth. When we lie, we feel guilty, and our health deteriorates from guilt-naturally, the healthier option is the truth.

Honesty is vital to trust and personal reliability. While self-delusion may be an inescapable truth of human nature, we must continually strive to challenge this disturbing reality to achieve our goals. Unfortunately, our cognitive processes are automatically geared toward accommodating our personal inclinations, distorting the truth in our “favour”. When trapped in a world of lies, you’ll only deceive yourself. Consistently exercising prudent behaviour, i.e., thinking about the future, is good. We might convince ourselves we need sunglasses. You don’t need glasses. Therefore, we practice self-delusion by concluding that our material demands precede our future prosperity.

When we acknowledge our choices carefully, we can make better decisions. Knowing we have a mortgage to pay implies we’ve made a decision. It is up to you whether it is a wise decision, but I would be cautious about any unnecessary financial expenditure. Ultimately, the decision to spend remains our sole responsibility, whatever the consequences may be. Thoughtless spending makes people uncomfortable, so thinking about what you spend and why requires personal interrogation. We all have to work on it.

Taking responsibility for our actions is one of the most valuable ways to empower ourselves and achieve our goals. When we avoid the accountability we desperately need to carry out, we’ll leave it to the last minute, resulting in procrastination, one of the deadliest ways to increase stress. Avoid making excuses to assume over responsibilities; you’ll eventually have to accept them, so accept them today. As a result, when we reduce our rational thinking to excuses, we are left with only these reflections about our own well-being. We can take control of our lives when we discover our priorities; we can affect others significantly when they see how self-reliant we can be. All we need to do is embrace our dreams and aspirations and continue to work toward our goals. It is all about forward thinking. We must focus on our current situation to look to the future. Therefore, we must consciously try to envisage an alternative reality – a tangible reality within our grasp, if only we can be truthful with ourselves.

‍

STEP 21 – Improve your social life

Without a social circle, our overall health, wealth and productivity wouldn’t be so enriching. However, being trapped in a group discouraging self-improvement would be equally troublesome. For this reason, we must continually strive to develop our interpersonal skills. There is so much that we can learn from social engagements and networks. If we don’t have a solid social circle, we’ll need to prioritize our overall social interaction. I think we always have the opportunity to meet new people; whoever you run into, they will be there! That’s the beauty of it; it never has to appear formal; it can happen at any time. I once knew someone with severe social anxiety, and trying to get him to interact with apprehensive people was futile—he simply couldn’t. Not all of us suffer like he did; we are fortunate for that. If we wanted to increase social interaction, our will would be substantial.

Firstly, we must question our values to fully understand what we want and who we want to meet. Even though you don’t enjoy the football game your peers watch together, see what happens when you get there. The difference is noticeable; you’ll have a better experience interacting with others than staying at home watching TV. Secondly, realizing that our overall social achievement depends on the amount of time, effort, and energy we are willing to invest is essential. As I stated earlier, not all of us are capable of social interaction; nevertheless, we should aspire towards it because we will lead a fuller, more enjoyable life the greater our interactions become.

Naturally, it may feel emotionally draining to constantly attend social events that require effort. However, if you want a strong circle of friends, invest your time, effort and energy. People around you will sense your social compatibility by flexing your interpersonal muscles. My friends have told me it’s easy to converse with me because I am very friendly. I believe that experiences come to those willing to take on the experience themselves; it’s like a double-edged sword scenario.

For this reason, we must become the entity we wish to attract. Therefore, to induce others to approach us, we must come to others. Of course, we won’t become “daredevils” in pursuing new and exciting contacts and friendships. But maybe we could try to push our comfort zones. The most effective method of building social confidence is by learning to causally interact with people in day-to-day situations. A very effective way to increase our social understanding is through indirect means. When you go to the grocery store, you can hire someone for their time. Before you know it, a conversation is ensuing and progressing quite well! An indirect approach can help you develop your self-confidence big time; in turn, you can avoid intimidating social situations.

Having learned to push your comfort zone, the next step is building social independence. With a deep and meaningful connection in your social circle, you can genuinely connect with your peers. In this case, the most effective decision will be to establish new relationships with new, more compatible people. If you already feel a growing separation from your current social circle, you will invariably find that the same people will only repress your continual growth. Therefore, I recommend that you build an independent process detached from your current circle of friends and increasingly compatible with your newfound reclamation. In doing so, you will automatically gravitate toward more contemporary, like-minded people.

One of the biggest mistakes we could make is believing that our ability to meet new people coincides with building lasting relationships.

We need to be able to bridge the gap to forge meaningful friendships. Therefore, following up on your introduction with an invitation is equally essential. This may be any activity or event you are currently involved in. For example, I’ve met people who, when you invited them, never tried to continue our potential friendship. You don’t want to be like that! It’s always a good idea to follow up, even if they don’t. It’s getting even more accessible because of the increased mobile accessibility of popular social networking sites like Facebook or Twitter.

Learning how to strengthen relationships is a good idea unless you’re seeking “single-serving” friends. Fortunately, a continually expanding social circle makes it easier to network with your peers. You will soon make new friends through your friends! Expanding our personal circle is not to win a popularity contest but to cultivate personal growth -enhancing our lives. For this reason, wealth cannot be expressed in simple monetary units but by social synergy. Therefore, a strong and supportive social network will enrich our daily lives and help us reduce our shortcomings.

‍

STEP 22 – Quit smoking

Whether you have been a smoker or recently acquired the habit, learning to quit can be difficult. With enough willpower and an effective plan, we can curb our cravings. Tobacco smoke is psychologically and physiologically addictive. While your actions are habitual, nicotine will result in long-term psychological dependence. If you remove nicotine from your daily routine, massive withdrawal symptoms will result. If you want to change your smoking habit, try to address this habitual behaviour and consult with a professional about the physical ramifications of nicotine withdrawal.

Before effectively tackling the habit, we must identify the reasons for our addiction. For many of us, smoking offers short-term relief from many emotions, including anxiety, stress, loneliness, depression and boredom. While smoking may temporarily alleviate the void within us, its detrimental effects on our health are far more profound. Fortunately, there are countless alternative and healthier options available to us.

One of the fundamental problems ex-smokers face is finding an alternative outlet for their anxiety. The same feelings and emotions will invariably persist in the absence of cigarettes. Naturally, when this happens, I feel that we have to find other alternative pacifiers to curb our angst. For example, we might want to try guided meditation or exercise, allowing us to effectively manage our emotional stress. When we’ve successfully eliminated our habit, we’ll most likely experience migraines and nausea due to the absence of sugar previously obtained from nicotine. For this reason, we’ll share an increased appetite (our bodies will seek alternative sugar sources).

However, as I’ve been told, these sugar cravings should subside after a few days since the body rapidly adjusts to our sugar intake. With your morning coffee, try to sweeten it with pure cane sugar (as opposed to a sugar substitute) to reach the threshold of sugar cravings. Ultimately, you’ll allow your body to slowly re-adjust. Due to smoking’s chronic nature, many smokers associate smoking with various other activities. For example, many of us automatically associate smoking with alcoholic beverages, causing us to “light up” with a drink in hand. Try to refrain from this social custom and instead drink indoors where smoking is prohibited, or alternatively, abstain from alcohol until cravings subside. I’m sure you’ve noticed already, but it is challenging to stop smoking around smokers! Let your friends know you’re trying to quit smoking, and hope they support your lifestyle change. It might be difficult to tell your old-time friends you’re leaving, so your only option is to develop/find another set of friends.

While ex-smokers often gain weight rapidly, excessive growth is relatively minimal, averaging only a few pounds. Most of the additional weight is achieved because of sudden sugar cravings, so focus on healthier options and effective coping mechanisms. In this case, a balanced diet and regular exercise will help us maintain a healthy weight. Rapid mood swings are common for ex-smokers, especially those who use smoking to control their anxiety. You’ll quickly become irritable or unusually impatient when you can’t get relief. Not only that, you’ll get headaches and temporary sleep apnoea. Doctors insist that you’ll be back to your usual everyday self within weeks after your circulatory system purges your body of remaining toxins. To help you cope with rapid mood swings, doctors suggest relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, yoga, and mindfulness. This will help you stay balanced and in control until your body adjusts to life without cigarettes.

Numerous anti-smoking medications are available at your local drugstore, but I would suggest visiting your doctor first about their possible side effects. One of the most popular is nicotine replacement therapy, which involves replacing harmful cigarette smoke with various nicotine substitutes. The most popular is a nicotine patch, which delivers a regular, controlled dose without the other toxic compounds typically found in cigarette smoke. The Cochrane review found that NRT increased successful cessation rates from 10% with placebo to 17%. Nicotine replacement therapy benefits those seeking to break their psychological addiction while focusing on alternative pacifiers. Alternative non-nicotine medications include Zyban and Chantix; however, consulting a licensed physician is essential. The FDA approved Nicorette gum, the first pharmaceutical NRT, for use by prescription as a tobacco cessation aid in 1984, with nicotine patches following in 1991. Many other Nicotine Replacement Therapy (NRT) products are available, such as lozenges, inhalers, and nasal sprays. These products can help smokers break the habit and reduce nicotine dependence. Quitting smoking is challenging but achievable with NRTs.

Encouragement and support come a long way in helping someone recover from a habit like this, but we should avoid stressing others. While various treatments and coping methods are available to individuals seeking healthier lifestyle changes, it’s worthwhile to distract yourself from your cravings with more engaging and exciting opportunities. Encouraging and supporting someone to quit smoking is an excellent way to fight the habit. You can help them with resources and support by talking with them about their cravings. You can also help them identify healthier activities or practices to replace smoking. Offering to do activities together is a very effective way to support them. I suggest walking, biking, playing sports with each other, or even just taking a stroll to enjoy nature. By engaging in activities together, you can provide the individual with an alternative source of pleasure and distraction from cravings.

If you relapse, try not to criticize yourself too much. Many former smokers took considerable perseverance and discipline to make a clean break. It is imperative to focus on the positive aspects. Even if you relapse, it’s worthwhile to remember that it doesn’t mean you failed. You can still learn from the experience and use it as an opportunity to modify certain behaviours and strategies to prevent future relapses. It is also helpful to find a support network of friends, family, or counsellors who can help you stay on track and help you cope with cravings and withdrawal symptoms.

‍

STEP 23 – Exercise regularly

Exercise is an essential component of every healthy lifestyle. Regular physical activity must be noticed to boost your energy or even your life. Since regular exercise increases brain oxygen supply, it improves mental and physical agility. It also encourages you to spend more time in the sun, which boosts vitamin D production. Your heart rate and blood flow to the brain increase when you exercise. More blood flow comes with more exposure to oxygen and nutrients, which is essential for a healthy brain.

Regular exercise builds muscle strength and improves endurance. Exercise amplifies oxygen and nutrient delivery to your vital organs and promotes cardiovascular system efficiency. Enhancing heart and lung functions will boost your energy. Physical therapy can improve mood by stimulating various chemical processes within the brain, raising your spirits. This will increase your confidence and boost your self-esteem. Exercise relieves tension, depression, anxiety and anger. In addition to feeling better after a vigorous workout, you will feel an overall improvement in your well-being by incorporating regular exercise into your daily routine.

While regular exercise may not be a comprehensive treatment for depression, it temporarily alleviates the burden. By undertaking 30-40 minutes of daily physical therapy, your body’s endorphins will naturally boost your overall mood, functioning as biological anti-depressants. Furthermore, studies have shown that physical therapy benefits individuals who did not respond to anti-depressants during clinical trials. Regular exercise also increases self-confidence and self-esteem. Active lifestyle activity also increases serotonin production, a hormone stabilising mood.

Suppose high blood pressure is your primary concern. In that case, you should know that regular exercise will boost your high-density lipoproteins (also known as “healthy cholesterol”) and reduce unhealthy triglycerides. Keeping your circulatory system active will decrease your risk of cardiovascular disease. However, regular exercise will also prevent health problems such as diabetes, stroke, metabolic syndrome, arthritis, cancer, and depression. Regular exercise lowers blood pressure by strengthening the heart and reducing force on the arteries.

Furthermore, regular exercise inhibits osteoporosis by strengthening the bone structure with a diet rich in vitamin D and calcium. Osteoporosis is characterised by decreased bone density, leading to weak and brittle bones. It is commonly seen in post-menopausal women and is caused by a lack of calcium, vitamin D, and other essential nutrients. Physical therapy will also improve our muscles, enhancing our body’s defence against rheumatoid arthritis. Exercise also helps to reduce inflammation, which is a main symptom of arthritis. Additionally, regular exercise can help to reduce stress and improve mental health, which is essential for managing the chronic pain of arthritis.+

By burning calories, regular exercise promotes weight loss and prevents excessive weight gain. This is because the more calories you burn, the less energy your body can store as fat. The most effective part is that you only need some time to enjoy these added benefits. It would be best to make the necessary changes to your daily routine, such as using stairs instead of elevators. For instance, walking for 30 minutes at a moderate speed can burn around 150-200 calories, depending on your body weight. Various simple activities will raise your heart rate, forcing you to reduce your caloric consumption. Brisk walking is easy and beneficial, and you can do it anytime. For example, you may park further away from the store, giving you another opportunity to practice a brisk walk. Regular exercise will help you fall asleep more quickly. This is because sleep latency (the time taken to fall asleep) is closely interlinked with how active we are during the day. In fact, every hour of sedentary activity takes three additional minutes to fall asleep.

Furthermore, regular exercise will also improve the overall quality of your night’s sleep and the amount of time spent in deep sleep, also known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. REM sleep, also known as Rapid Eye Movement sleep, is a type of deep sleep during which the eyes move rapidly from side to side. It is the deepest stage of sleep, during which the body repairs itself and restores energy. Regular exercise can improve the quality and amount of REM sleep an individual gets, resulting in better overall health and well-being. Maybe you are too tired to be physically intimate with your partner. Regular exercise will leave you energised and look better. This, in turn, will profoundly affect your bedroom time. Furthermore, men who exercise regularly are far less likely to develop erectile dysfunction.

Without regular exercise, your body will weaken and lose its ability to function correctly. As a rule of thumb, you should exercise a minimum of 30 minutes a day. For every additional hour of regular exercise you undertake, your life expectancy increases by two hours (so they say).

So stop wasting time and see for yourself! As soon as you make regular physical activity a part of your daily life, you will feel the benefits and reap the rewards in no time. Of course, you should always consult with your doctor or physician before beginning a new workout routine. This is especially relevant for those with health problems.

‍

STEP 24 – Eat right

A balanced diet should always be our primary source of vitamins and minerals; however, dietary supplements will also ensure the appropriate intake of the necessary nutrients. These supplements may be comprised of herbal or glandular extracts. The former consists of enzymes and probiotics, while the latter are derived from animal organs. Most dietary supplements are perfectly safe, but remember that the Food and Drug Administration does not regulate them; therefore, consult a qualified physician before use.

We should get our necessary vitamins and minerals from a nutrition-rich diet; however, vitamin supplements are particularly beneficial for those suffering from vitamin deficiencies, which may arise from various ailments. Since doses are carefully controlled, most supplements provide our bodies with nutrients. A nutrition-rich diet is essential for maintaining good health, providing our bodies with vitamins and minerals. Eating a balanced diet of fresh fruits and vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains will ensure our bodies get the necessary vitamins and minerals to stay healthy.

In addition to multivitamin products, obtaining their respective ingredients, such as vitamin B12, is possible. While the dosage may be higher than the multivitamin equivalent, these particular vitamins are particularly helpful in treating individual deficiencies. For example, an increased daily vitamin C intake may be prescribed to treat scurvy (a disease involving gingival redness of the gums). Following a meal, our bodies begin to break down the carbohydrates, fats and proteins in our food to absorb the necessary nutrients. As the digestive process is heavily dependent on various vitamins, especially vitamin B, we might need to supplement our diets with B-group vitamins to avoid their deficiency. The onset of a vitamin deficiency may result in a wide range of complications, including damage to the ligaments and joints.

Consuming additional nutrients will support tissue repair and cellular maintenance. Due to the continual strain our daily activities inflict on our bodies, vitamin supplements enhance the production of additional proteins to replace damaged tissue. A vitamin deficiency may also cause defects in biological reproduction, leading to a host of degenerative diseases. Supplementing your dinners with Vitamin D might be an excellent idea to ensure cellular repair and maintenance. Not only will supplementing your meals with Vitamin D helps to ensure cellular repair and maintenance, but it can also safeguard you from the health risks associated with a vitamin deficiency, like degenerative diseases or defects in biological reproduction.

Most importantly, a regulated vitamin intake will also help prevent the onset of cancer. Due to the anti-oxidizing properties of vitamins A, C, and E, these compounds will effectively neutralize free radicals that are constantly bombarding our bodies daily. Researchers say that an abundance of free radicals that cause cellular damage will inevitably lead to cancer. Although this has been heavily debated, one must nevertheless remain cautious. Just to be on the safe side, which I am, try to take anti-oxidants to reduce the risk of malignant tumours.

Minerals like calcium and magnesium are frequently overlooked in our daily diets. While calcium is essential in maintaining our teeth and bones’ steady growth, magnesium is vital in ensuring a stable metabolic rate. Magnesium and calcium are equally responsible for maintaining a healthy cardiovascular system. In addition, they neutralize an excess of alkali within the bloodstream. Furthermore, magnesium is critical for regulating nerve and muscle function and aiding in calcium absorption and other essential minerals. Calcium and magnesium also work together to reduce the risk of cancer.

Potassium regulates water distribution throughout the body. For this reason, the body’s ability to metabolize complex carbohydrates and proteins depends on stable levels of this mineral. Furthermore, potassium also regulates our heart rate. A supplemental potassium intake will benefit those suffering from angina, stroke, diabetes, muscular dystrophy and insomnia. Potassium is also necessary for energy production and helps regulate blood pressure. It is essential for proper muscle and nerve functioning and can reduce the risk of osteoporosis.

Of course, dietary supplements have risks. By their very nature, these supplements are not subject to the same scrutiny as prescription drugs. Therefore, a manufacturer can claim that a specific product reduces the risk of an ailment without any supporting evidence. For this reason, it is imperative to always undertake the appropriate due diligence before usage.

Despite this caveat, many supplements are still perfectly safe, provided we follow the prescribed dosage. A vitamin overdose will harm the body and threaten our health. For example, copious amounts of vitamin C may result in diarrhoea; similarly, an excess of vitamin A is toxic to the body. This is equally true of mineral supplements-an iron overdose can be fatal. You should also be aware that a cocktail of supplements might result in life-threatening complications when mixed with certain prescription drugs.

Therefore, before including supplements in your daily diet, you should always research the benefits and risks. If you feel a specific nutrient is lacking in your diet, please consult your doctor before seeking dietary supplements.

‍

STEP 25 – Boost your brain power

Our mental acumen depends mainly on our intellectual stamina, which can be enhanced through regular neurological training. I’m constantly flexing “the little grey cells,” as Agatha Christie’s Poirot says. Exercising our ingenuity will help us remain sharp and improve our cognitive performance. Playing brain-teaser games and puzzles, solving riddles, and reading complex books can stimulate the mind and improve mental endurance. Mental exercise is as critical as physical exercise to keep the brain functioning optimally.

The human brain reacts and adapts to its environment. It engineers additional neural pathways due to constant intellectual stimulation. In short, it’s possible to reconstruct our brain’s internal wiring through the “neuroplasticity” process – a process capable of enhancing cognitive progression. Neuroplasticity is the process by which the brain rewires itself in response to various experiences and stimuli. It is an adaptive process that allows the brain to make connections between neurons and form circuitry pathways that promote better neurological functioning. Neuroplasticity is vital in developing cognitive abilities and keeping the brain sharp.

Of course, you must nourish the brain as you would the rest of the body. We can nurture the mind’s vitality by providing nutrients and plenty of sleep. Sleep deprivation inhibits our neurological ability to operate at maximum capacity, impairing our ability to resolve problems or tackle creative tasks. For this reason, a good night’s sleep is critical during REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep.

While some of us aren’t thrilled doing crossword puzzles all day (I wouldn’t say I like crosswords), others do it in ways you can’t imagine. I prefer chess, but others can easily socialise to enhance their socialising skills. Some aren’t surprised that relationships help stabilise the brain’s integrity and emotional well-being—so try to surround yourself in an environment that’s positive, helpful, supportive and challenging (your brain needs exercise).

Stress has a detrimental impact on our brain’s expansion capacity. Stress can easily lead you to develop counter-productive habits, distract your mind, and cause you to make mistakes you would never have considered. Pressure can destroy healthy brain cells. Others have argued that constant stress may damage the hippocampus, which forms memories. For this reason, we should focus on daily stress-relieving exercises, such as meditation. Meditation will improve our pre-existing conditions and enhance our creative abilities. Stress has a detrimental impact on our brain’s expansion capacity as it can easily lead to developing counter-productive habits, distract the mind, and cause one to make mistakes that they would not have considered. Pressure can also damage healthy brain cells, and constant stress may even damage the hippocampus, the part of the brain responsible for forming memories.

Eating a healthy diet is essential for mental health. Foods high in omega-3 fatty acids, such as salmon, trout, mackerel, and tuna, are especially beneficial for brain health and can improve cognitive performance. Eating a balanced diet with plenty of fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins is also helpful for overall mental health. Additionally, getting enough sleep is critical for mental health as it reduces stress, improves concentration, and enhances creativity. Ensuring proper nutritional intake and avoiding excess calories and saturated fat foods is essential. Not only do these increase our risk of degenerative neurological diseases, but they also inhibit our concentration and ability to form long-lasting memories.

Sodium fluoride is a chemical compound commonly found in tap water in the United States. It has been linked to reduced cognitive performance, with studies suggesting it may impair the intellect by up to 70%. For this reason, many people living in affected areas choose to filter sodium fluoride from their water using a reverse osmosis system or a filtration system such as Brita®. Additionally, many bottled water companies also filter sodium fluoride from their water. Furthermore, there are also natural sources of fluoride, such as certain types of tea, that are not contaminated with the chemical.

Regarding physical strength, we should continually exercise our muscles to counter entropic degeneration. Of course, this is equally true of the brain. In this case, we should undertake a variety of regular cognitive exercises to strengthen our cognitive abilities. Entropic degeneration is the gradual decay of physical and mental strength due to age, illness, or lack of use. It is a natural process that accelerates with age and can lead to decreased muscle mass, reduced cognitive functioning, and a decline in overall physical health. Regular exercise and mental stimulation are essential for slowing entropic degeneration and maintaining a healthy body and mind.

However, the brain will further develop this neural network with continual mental stimulation. Neural pathways are the connections between neurons in the brain. A healthy adult should already possess more than 1.3 million neural pathways, transmitting signals between axons and dendrites within the brain. They are formed by the connections between axons and dendrites, enabling neurons to communicate and create memories and associations. Regular mental stimulation can develop more neural pathways, allowing for more complex thinking and problem-solving abilities. For instance, when learning a new language, the brain creates new pathways to remember and recognise words.

Mental stimulation may come from a wide variety of activities. As long as the action is novel, challenging, and enjoyable, it will boost our mental understanding. For this reason, it’s essential to ensure that the activity interests us: the more enjoyable the task, the more likely we are to continue pursuing it! For example, listening to Christopher Gunner’s Poirot theme song inspired me to learn the piano. This is because I want to play music myself!

When exercising our minds, we should pay close attention to our chosen activities. It takes about 7-8 seconds of intensive mental focus to commit a piece of information to memory. Therefore, it will only be possible if you have a long attention span. Once we commit to something, like acquiring that information or the particular sequence of notes required to play Poirot on the piano, we have to repeat it several times before memorising what we’re doing. Remember, practice makes perfect!

In conclusion, we must take care of our physical brain to boost its cognitive abilities and intellectual activity and provide it with constant stimulation. The sky is the limit, and everyone can be brilliant at something. The more you do it, the greater your chance of developing a talent for it and powering your brain to new heights!

‍

STEP 26 – Reach your goals

Our mental acumen depends mainly on our How do we define success? One person’s perception of success may vary significantly from another. Consequently, a universal definition of success is difficult to interpret. While some valued family, adventure and independence, others emphasized work, creativity and achievement. However, regardless of personal taste, we should continue to engage in those activities that are particularly meaningful to us. This is the key to success. We must focus on our passions and tap into our inner strengths. In this way, we can be sure that our definition of success will be fulfilled.

Firstly, we must cultivate a hunger for positive thinking and optimism among those around us and those we influence. Cynics may perceive an overly optimistic approach as remarkably naïve when optimism increases longevity and sustains a valuable raison d’être (reason for being). Furthermore, optimism increases our overall endurance level in the face of adversity while providing a necessary incentive to look to the future. Most importantly, an optimistic outlook benefits our health, releasing endorphins to stimulate positivity and inhibit disease onset. Positive emotions strengthen the immune system, reduce inflammation, and promote the release of hormones that protect against stress. Optimism also encourages people to take action and adopt healthier behaviours, such as exercising, eating healthy, and engaging socially. These actions increase a healthier and longer life.

Having adopted the necessary mindset, it is crucial to strategize appropriately to avoid a perplexing and aimless approach to our day-to-day. On the contrary, we will benefit from a perspective that enables us to focus on our goals. Therefore, we should adopt an approach that addresses not only our short-term objectives but also our long-term goals. This can be accomplished through several tracking methods – evaluating the need for change to improve our personal lives. Naturally, many of us automatically keep track of our lives, whether they are health, finances, weight, or calorie intake. For example, athletes will typically keep track of the distance covered in their daily exercise routine, while contractors will track their time. Following a similar approach, we can accomplish our goals by evaluating our progress. In turn, we can motivate ourselves while increasing our overall stamina.

However, when identifying a long-term goal, weigh the reward against the time and effort invested to achieve a specific task. The goal is to decide on something that will enhance our lives, so whatever you choose, find out where your emotions and feelings lie. Long-term goals should be SMART: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Setting long-term goals breaks down complex tasks into smaller and more manageable parts. It is imperative to set realistic goals that are achievable in a reasonable amount of time. It is also important to reassess and adjust them as needed. Additionally, it is essential to remember to celebrate small successes and stay motivated throughout the process.
‍

Look for something that has meaning to you and is possible to accomplish and ensure you can achieve it. Interested in constructing a gazebo in your backyard? Alternatively, you may have hoped to establish a charitable trust. Any objective you choose should be the top priority.
‍

Conclusion

To know the next step, we must ask ourselves: how will this impact my everyday life? For example, how would completing the gazebo help? You may want to see and envision the outcome since it will fuel your motivation. It would help if you considered what factors influence your goal. A thorough analysis of these variables will allow us to break the task down into its components. In turn, we can take a systematic step-by-step approach to completing your goals.

0